DesMenism

After finished watching my tv show. I had an inspire to publish this post. I rapidly asking myself. What is life? or What is my life? I cant get any satisfying answer. This is what the show said" Life is not a very long period, don't give yourself so much pressure and gap to tighten your freedom" I am 18 years old now, basically I still have 50 or 60 years to go. So, what I face tommorow or what my path is totally unknown.
The show are talking about a small nomadic "groups" travelling around The Sahara desert. What they want for their live is totally simple and most of all they dont even have a fixed shelter. In the Sahara desert, the world largest desert is a big freeland. A view that without any disturbance. Their life is full of freedom. No worries and pressure. Once they have finish utilized up all the resources near them, they will shift again. I do not know whether I want freedom or being locked up in the city which full of pressure. The freedom I want, is not the kind of freedom that nobody control you, do anything you like and go anywhere you want. The freedom I want, is free from the heart.

My life. Sometimes, I heard my pals talked about their childhood stories. How fun and happy they are. But I don't even remember what sweet memories during my childhood time. I hated my father for giving me such a bad and unprotective shelter . I blame him for not giving me the best. Blaming him for bringing troubles home. Blaming him for upseting the whole family members. And most of all blaming him for not giving me the opportunity to do what I love to do. One or two people asking me," Why you choose HR?, Good meh?". Then, I will answer them,"Interested mah". The truth is not. This is the first time I tell someone if I not mistooken. If I had told someone maybe the person is Ky, Ruby or Justin. Actually I am not so interested in HR. I like something that can be spotted by everyone. My second choice was Air-steward or pilot. Because of monetary problem, I "terpaksa" to let go all my ambitions and take HR. Because business is the fastest path to gain money. The whole family putting their effort and hope on me. So I cant put them in risk. I need gain more money to give my mom, brothers and sister a more comfortable environment to live in. I dont want them to follow my footstep or path, do not have the opportunity to choose their likes. I dont dare to say I am noble. It is only what I feel and what I hope to.

Anyway, Life is not a long period, as the show stated. Why dont I be more open minded to everyone. Widespread my view. Try to stand in other point or position to look at the situation. So that I will lock and tighten in my only point of view. Appreciate everyone around me. Someday, they will leave us. If you cant change the people, why dont you change yourself? Do everything I love to, but not harming or hurting people. If has such a way, why not I give it a try. One of my senior told me "You are still young, dont scare to lose, try everything. The most important was what you gain during the progress and not what is the result or what you gain after the progress".